Wednesday, 22 October 2008

• The Ultimate Thinsporation... is back!

   

  Beautiful Ital <3 is back bitches haha

   Xanga just sent a message to my email and i hadn't been on xanga in a long time (long=2 years!) so i thought id take a peek at my old blog and now i feel like starting over with it haha! Let me just reintroduce myself since it's been a while. I used to post a lot about my progess to achieving my ultimate goal of weighing 120 pds. That may not seem all that impressive, but consider this... in 2004 i used to weigh 185 pds (size 18 pants and extra large shirts to size 8 and extra small shirts... Yes i was that 'fat girl' in high school. After being depressed about how i looked, feeling unhealthy, and seeing all the pretty girls get attention i knew it was time for a change.

  

  Before ^

  It took in total around 5 months to loose 60 pds. It wasn't easy, both psyhically and mentally. I worked out, on average, 6 hours a day. Starting with a run at 6am, then having gym class during the day, followed by a 2 hour rugby practice, and then after going home from that i'd walk to the gym (20min) and work out for around and hour and then walk home, all with very little, or nothing, in my stomach.

  After getting down to a comfertable size the challenge of maintaing it had it's difficulties. Being italian (mangia mangia!!), being in a relationship, and having a very busy lifestlye all contributed to the temptations i endured with keeping my new small frame.

  Now it's 2008 (almost 2009!!!) and im still determined to reach my goal weight of 120 pds. This time I'd like to continue to be an inspiration for those girls who are faced with health issues (such as being overweight or suffering from obesity) and societal pressures in society and from the media.

  I have suffered from anorexia and it continues to linger in my thoughts often. It is something you may not know you have, but it is a disorder that should be recognized. For me to get through it, i had to tell myself it's always mind over matter. Ana is a dangerous disease that takes a large toll on your body as well as your emotions. I remember weighing myself after everything i did concerning my body and I also remember going 6 days without eating and often being dizzy or close to fainting. Those are not the proper ways of loosing weight and i knew that at the time but the mental ability to end the improper treatment to my body had seem to fade away with the success (or what i thought was success was) of loosing weight.

  Unfortunantly, i have continued to be known for skipping meals and eating minimal amounts of food when life seems to get stressful for me or when ana whispers to me after a binging week that i do not look attractive at all. I understand that my ana is a control issue, and she seems to come out when i loose what i feel is control over my life and skipping a meal to try to better my image at that given time is the only thing i feel i have left to control when my life gets too stressful or unmangable.

  Acknowledging Ana and the reasons why it occurs is important because it is a serious mental health disease. The biggest advice i could give girls suffering with ana is to tell your girlfriends, even your guyfriends (i found guys seem to care about the issue even better than my gfs at times) that you skip meals, not necessarily that your ana, but just let them know you dont eat as often as you should... Ana isnt something you have to go through alone.

  So now i weight 133.5 as of today and i would like to slowly and in a healthier manner than before loose the final 13.5 pounds and end the book of my true life 'ugly duckling'. Although, what i feel is healthy for myself may not be the same for an average person and how i progress through my weightloss shouldn't be an example for others. I'm simply here to demonstrate that with proper excersize and eating the right amount and the right types of food, that acheieving

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  is in fact possible and i will help girls who would like encouragement as well as give advice about what works along their way to their goal and hopefully we can all be inspirations for each other.

  I'm sorry this is such a long post, but i had lots to say like always and im definatly not a shy person.

  Feel free to add me as your friend or subscribe to my xanga and i'll continue to add thinspo, tips, encouragement, my own progress, shoutouts, and use my blog as a venting tool when i get a little stressed out :)

  Hope to hear from many girls like myself and get to know other girls who are struggling with their own weightloss.

  I'm here for all the xanga girls that are struggling with their own weightloss and i look forward to hearing from you all!

  Ciao from beautfiul_ital, Stay Strong

     

  xoxox

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